Letters

Dear Mailperson (I happen to have a mail MAN, but that's no longer PC),

I would really love it if you would quit bringing me more bills. Let's face it, I have no money and it just causes stress for me to see them. So just don't bring them anymore. Instead, please bring large checks. Will six zeros. Or more. I would be ok with more. Actually, if you bring me the large checks, I would be ok with the bills. So just bring both. Thanks-
Me


Dear children,

I happen to know that you were all born with function arms, hand, legs and feet. So why does it seem to be impossible for you to put things away? I've lost track of how many times I have had to put away the peanut butter and the cold cereal after you have left it out. And we won't even start on the laundry. Please work on it.
Love,
Mom


Dear world,

I'm a little cranky and stressed out most of the time. Sorry.
Me